On a Living Spree
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Time is truly our most valuable natural resource… but we don’t treat it that way. In fact, people tend to be pretty oblivious about where their time goes and why. That’s how they end up “busy” from dawn to dusk and yet somehow not doing anything they actually want to do. When we (mistakenly) act as if there will always be more time, we never get around to achieving our dreams and goals.
“Time” is a paradox. Something that parents of young children say all the time is that “the years are short, but the days are long.” And that’s how life actually is.
This was all possible because I had allowed my dreams to evolve and grow over time.
Like mine, your vision is not set in stone. It will change as you get older, discover new things, and meet new people—and that’s okay. You may find that after years or even decades pursuing the same thing, you’ve gotten everything out of it that you can, or it turned out to be different from what you expected, or it just doesn’t excite you the way it once did.
Stay attuned to those feelings. As risky as it may feel to change course, the greater risk is staying in a career, business, or relationship even when it no longer feels right. Sadly, people do this all the time. They get trapped by golden handcuffs, trading years of misery for shiny benefits they may or may not live to enjoy. Or they look back at all the time and effort they’ve invested in their path and can’t bear to see it go to “waste.” Or they feel overwhelmed by the challenge of starting something new.
Why is friendship crucial for your company and its culture?
Connection through rich experiences and shared goals is the way to attract, retain and nurture talent. Shared experiences cultivate a culture of community, belonging and wellbeing at work. Gallup states their #1 predictor of success at work is having a best friend at work.
Ever find yourself questioning the true essence of wealth? It's a sentiment many of us share. In a world that often equates prosperity with the thickness of our wallets, let's take a moment to ponder a simple yet profound truth: wealth isn't just about money; it's about the richness of our experiences.
In today’s episode of the Win Monday podcast, we are delighted to introduce two extraordinary individuals, Bridget Hilton and Joe Huff, authors of the book Experiential Billionaire. They have lived a life filled with diverse and adventurous experiences, from training as samurais to dancing with the northern lights, and even standing face-to-face with hungry lions on safari. Today, we delve into their journeys and the lessons they've learned along the way.
In our conversation, Bridget and Joe share their journeys of self-discovery, the importance of experiences over material wealth, and their shift in perspective on life after facing personal challenges. They also provide practical advice on how to start living a life focused on experiences, emphasizing the importance of taking small steps toward achieving one's dreams and goals. They conclude by encouraging listeners to become experiential billionaires by embracing a life filled with meaningful experiences.
When’s the last time you did something just for the sheer fun of it?
I’m not talking about big vacations or meticulously planned outings. I mean those little, impromptu acts of joy. Like diving into a pile of leaves, fully knowing you’ll have to rake them up again. Or maybe having a random dance-off in your living room, or deciding to cook a fancy dinner on a Tuesday night, just for kicks.
Or maybe it is it is about those bigger dreams – like finally taking that trip you’ve always talked about, riding in a hot air balloon, or learning to snowboard, regardless of your age.
These moments, big or small, are what make life vibrant. They remind us that joy isn’t just in grand gestures or milestones. Often, it’s the spontaneous, simple things that leave a lasting impression.
So that’s what we’re talking about today.
Bridget Hilton, author of Experiential Billionaire: Build a Life Rich in Experiences and Die With No Regrets, says the brain’s amygdala is largely responsible for the adult urge to opt out of new activities. “The amygdala is responsible for processing emotions and can trigger a fear response when faced with uncertainty, making individuals hesitant to step out of their comfort zones,” she says. “When you’re in fight-or-flight mode, everything you do or don’t do teaches the brain something about the perceived threat. When you avoid or flee the situation, your brain experiences a wave of relief. The amygdala learns that avoiding that situation is how you stay safe from that threat.”
Because neural pathways become more established with age, many of us find it increasingly difficult to branch out and try new things as adults. “Children are generally more open to exploration due to their natural curiosity and the brain’s heightened plasticity,” Hilton says. While everyone is different in terms of when and why anxiety arises at the prospect of new experiences, adolescence typically introduces fears of failure and social rejection, while adulthood exacerbates pressures to conform to social norms while established routines and habits are continuously reinforced.
Fourteen years ago, I went with four of my friends to get our photo taken with Santa at the Burbank mall. Were we far too old to be doing this? Absolutely. Did we care that we were the only group in line that did not include young children? Nope. Is Santa kinda creepy with five grown women sitting on his lap? Definitely… which makes it even more hilarious. What was meant to be a one-time joke turned out to be so fun that it became an annual tradition, complete with themes and costumes. Even as our own families and lives grow and change, it’s a once-a-year event where we can feel like kids again with each other.
Over time, the things you used to play at become serious endeavors, or to-do list items, or no longer worth doing at all. Running around with your friends outside becomes running on the treadmill at the gym, scheduling coffee dates to see your friends, and attending networking events to make new ones. We think of those activities as good and healthy, but they’re actually remarkably unnatural, not to mention not very fun. Because if you saw a kid doing any of those things, you would feel like you were in an alternate universe. Kids don’t run to stay fit, they run to feel the wind on their face and the grass beneath their feet. Kids don’t network to climb a career ladder, they bond through joyful moments. Kids go for what they want without worrying about why or what for—they just want to have fun. As adults, we deny ourselves that luxury without understanding the incredible benefits we’re missing out on.
Life is short. We know this all too well, and yet rarely make changes to ensure we are living a life without regret. Research shows that we feel the loss and regret of the thing not done, far more than the things we did, but got wrong.
Not only that, but our biggest mistakes often prove to be the greatest factors in our growth. Teaching us and pushing us beyond what we thought it was possible to endure, allowing us to expand in emotional and intellectual intelligence and problem-solving.
Our choices ripple out into the world around us, when we think about what it means to live a life without regret, consider your legacy, your ripples, and whether they left the world better or worse. At the end of our lives, we don’t regret making enough money. But we do regret all the time we lost to the grind.
Bridget Hilton, author and keynote speaker at Experiential Billionaire, is this episode’s featured guest. She speaks powerfully about what it means to live a life with no regrets, how new experiences empower us to be bolder, and how your life can transform when you give back.
If you find yourself putting your dreams off, or worse, not even daring to dream them, then this is the episode to get you thinking about today, not someday!
During this interview, you'll learn...
- The value of new experiences
- How to live a life with no regrets
- The importance of giving back
The 'what are you waiting for' vibe really struck me. We can do anything we set our minds to. I get caught up sometimes in all the things that can hold me back. There will always be obstacles. But I prayed about it all and I was given an idea, and it can truly make a difference, and I want to make the most of this life.
Most people bury this knowledge in the back of their brains and heap on distraction upon distraction—anything to avoid seriously reflecting on the fact that our time here is limited. We hide it away in hospitals and retirement homes. We pay lip service with bumper-sticker phrases like “life is short” or “you only live once,” but mostly we just suppress thoughts of our own mortality.
Bringing up this topic is considered bad form. Society operates under a silent agreement to keep any mention of our mortality off-limits. And when it happens—a friend gets in a car accident, a relative passes from a heart attack—you still might think, That's not going to happen to me.
Well, unfortunately, life is not a dress rehearsal, and death is too important to ignore. To embrace and understand what it means to really live, we need to make sure our relationship with and understanding of death is honest and realistic.
The truth is you can't take it with you - so why not gift experiences (to yourself and others) rather than things?
Bridget Hilton and Joe Huff are obsessed with experiences.
Determined to unlock the secrets of their power to transform lives, they have spent years interviewing social science experts, conducting the largest study on life experiences ever done, and turning themselves into experiential guinea pigs.
Together they have trained to be samurai, danced with the northern lights, tracked silverback gorillas in a hailstorm, stood face to face with hungry lions on safari, absorbed life lessons from Maasai Mara tribesmen, sped across glaciers on dogsleds, built schools for kids in need, studied with monks, helped give 50,000 people hearing, swum with sharks, and explored the experiential riches life has to offer.
As pandemic restrictions started to loosen a little, I was overjoyed to find my pod of friends interested in doing all sorts of new activities—tie-dying clothes, teaching ourselves to roll sushi, hosting Connect Four tournaments, fermenting and labeling our own hot sauce and pickles, and sneaking out to Venice Beach at midnight to swim in the bioluminescent waves. As bad as the pandemic was in many ways, seeing others try new things with people they love was a bright spot, a small glimpse of what life should be like.
These experiences gave me natural bursts of serotonin and dopamine—feel-good hormones—that jolted me out of my depression temporarily. The novelty forced me to pay close attention to the task at hand, leaving little room to dwell on the past or worry about the future. And when I succeeded at something new, it helped build my confidence and courage.
My personal experience aligns perfectly with scientific research. The evidence states that simply being more present by doing something new stimulates and activates regions of our brain that improve our mood.
When you were younger, you might have had some type of allowance to use on whatever you wanted. What if you gave yourself an allowance for your experiences? We’re not personal finance experts, and there are plenty of books on that if you want to go deep (I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi is a great place to start). We do, however, know that when experiences truly become the priority, spending habits often change.
One day in your past, you had the last sleepover with your childhood friends, you just didn’t realize it. The last time you played hide and seek. The last time you pranked your parents. The last time you had a snowball fight. But why?
We asked 20,000 people, “What’s an experience you did as a child that you’d love to do again?”
Some of my closest friends are people that I worked with that I shared once in a lifetime (or just out of the ordinary) experiences with, whether it was staying in a haunted castle in Scotland together, seeing someone hear for the first time, hiking Machu Picchu, or simply staying up all night talking about life after attending Coachella together. But it wasn't just about having a good time.
Shared goals and experiences play a crucial role in fostering a great corporate culture by creating a sense of unity, belonging, and purpose among employees.
Here are some ways in which they contribute to a positive corporate culture:
This is a simple one, but can be powerful.
Plan an experience by yourself that you would normally do with someone else. For some people this could be as big as an overseas trip, for others it could be going to the movies, a baseball game, a hike, or a class.
Take notice of how you feel doing this on your own.
When did you stop playing? And by playing, I mean doing something just for fun, with no goals or expectations about the outcome. Even if it’s a game with winners and losers, the result doesn’t matter, and your aim isn’t to get better over time. It’s just to enjoy. (Consuming entertainment doesn’t count—real play involves your active engagement, beyond just watching a screen or turning the page.)
As a kid, practically all you wanted to do was play. Every other activity (school, homework, chores, family dinner) was something you had to get through so you could go play.
But little by little, other things became more important. It’s not just that you now spend more (or most) of your time making sure bills get paid, people get taken care of, chores get done, etc. There’s been a social and psychological shift in priorities, too. Society expects adults to be productive, responsible, and serious; play is a luxury reserved for children. So, you might feel like it’s immature to play, and other people would judge you for it. And the less you play, the less exercise your imagination gets, and the more focused you become on practical matters—perpetuating the downward spiral of playtime.